{July 9 2012}

LIKED BY 1590

roundtop:

My two cents on the Tyler Oakley “punching people who joke about rape is wrong because you shouldn’t use violence to teach lessons” drama I see on my dash right now:

  • Sure, in an ideal world no one would hurt anyone ever and we’d all hold hands and talk through our problems using I-statements.
  • This is not that world.
  • What Tyler Oakley most likely does not realize, as a man, is that most women deal with rape jokes and rape culture dozens of times every single day without saying a single word. And when we do react, the vast, vast majority of the time we are more than sensitive, more than patient, more than understanding of the people who are contributing to our oppression. We turn the other cheek thousands and thousands of times. And you know what? Snapping and punching some asshole who’s joking about a horrific form of violence one time out of ten thousand is a pretty good fucking rate.
  • Now think about dealing with that level of shit when you’re not just a woman, but a rape survivor, which a hell of a lot of people are. Think about that, having what is most likely the worst experience of your life trivialized on a daily basis. Not lighting people on fire should earn a survivor a fucking Nobel Peace Prize. Only punching one shithead should earn a survivor sainthood.
  • Also:
  • MAKING RAPE JOKES
  • CONTRIBUTES TO RAPE CULTURE
  • AND CREATES AN ENVIRONMENT
  • WHEREIN PEOPLE ARE RAPED
  • IT IS VIOLENCE IN ITS OWN RIGHT
  • We have tried talking calmly about it.
  • We have tried workshops.
  • We have tried ad campaigns.
  • We have tried sitting down with the people who hurt us again and again and hand-holding them through the process of realizing that what they’re doing is fucking evil.
  • Sometimes it works. Most of the time it doesn’t. And you know what? If someone’s not going to change their mind? Then that person getting decked a) might make them think twice about saying that shit out loud around whoever decked them b) might make anyone else there think twice about saying that shit ever and c) probably made the person who got to punch them feel better. And you know what? That sounds like a pretty sweet deal to me.
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